Inappropriate Ways to Celebrate the Summer Solstice List

I had a little fun on Facebook today posting these as they came to mind. Part of my inner cynic came out and played with my odd sense of humor. Enjoy.
#1- Sunburn. Apollo/Sol/Ra most likely does not want your flesh crispy fried as some sort of sick homage to them. After all, you really think they'd want to have sex with a lobster the next time they decide to incarnate and father some offspring?
#2- Skyclad in Public. While it might be a genuine expression of your desire to celebrate in true Wiccan style, please refrain from exposing too much (or all) of yourself today while wandering amongst the unprepared masses. We might end up liking it, we might end up traumatized. Please don't assume we'll be jonesing for a gander at your goodies, though.
#3- Arson. Yes, yes, all hail the god(s) of light and warmth and joy and... fire. It's true, the sun is a big ball of fire. However, your office building should not become your burnt offering, people. Some of us nice, non-douchey people probably work with you too. You could at least have the decency to include us in the blaze-making if you're going to do it at all.
#4- Glitter. This is a personal pet peeve of mine. I'd rather you not run around whacking people with your fairy wand and dumping a god-awful amount of glitter "fairy dust" all over people. That shit doesn't go away. And it spreads. There's a reason it's called the herpes of the craft world. Take your shiny and play by yourself somewhere far far away. You could call this a public service announcement too, I suppose. 
Here's a funny "naked people" pic for the hell of it.
Naked People, summer, solstice, celebrate, holidays

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