Inappropriate Ways to Celebrate the Summer Solstice List

I had a little fun on Facebook today posting these as they came to mind. Part of my inner cynic came out and played with my odd sense of humor. Enjoy.
#1- Sunburn. Apollo/Sol/Ra most likely does not want your flesh crispy fried as some sort of sick homage to them. After all, you really think they'd want to have sex with a lobster the next time they decide to incarnate and father some offspring?
#2- Skyclad in Public. While it might be a genuine expression of your desire to celebrate in true Wiccan style, please refrain from exposing too much (or all) of yourself today while wandering amongst the unprepared masses. We might end up liking it, we might end up traumatized. Please don't assume we'll be jonesing for a gander at your goodies, though.
#3- Arson. Yes, yes, all hail the god(s) of light and warmth and joy and... fire. It's true, the sun is a big ball of fire. However, your office building should not become your burnt offering, people. Some of us nice, non-douchey people probably work with you too. You could at least have the decency to include us in the blaze-making if you're going to do it at all.
#4- Glitter. This is a personal pet peeve of mine. I'd rather you not run around whacking people with your fairy wand and dumping a god-awful amount of glitter "fairy dust" all over people. That shit doesn't go away. And it spreads. There's a reason it's called the herpes of the craft world. Take your shiny and play by yourself somewhere far far away. You could call this a public service announcement too, I suppose. 
Here's a funny "naked people" pic for the hell of it.

The Wedding of Heaven and Earth - Litha 2011

 Technically it's June 21st, 2011, but it doesn't quite feel like "today" yet as I have yet to go to bed. When the mood strikes, I have to write. Even if I don't quite know what to write about. That led to some Facebook polling and then to some browsing on Google on the summer solstice (northern hemisphere) which hits at roughly 1:16 pm in one of the timezones... yeah, I researched that little fact out extensively, I know. Either way, it's today, people. 
The raging trend that I found while using the web to start the juices going was blog posts about the sun and all things sunny and summer-ish. That's cool. It's a bit copy-paste. Seriously, the majority of the articles I found weren't anything more than the same text as every other site out there. Somebody, and/or a bunch of somebodies, found a wikipedia entry and decided that it was their "original" work. For shame. Underneath the bullshit I found a few gems. The ones that really grabbed my attention were pages talking about the balance of the earth, the sun and the moon's relationship, and the Celtic belief that the summer solstice was the marriage of Heaven and Earth. How I've missed that all these years, I don't know. 

This quote on a blog/journal/site titled song-of-songs.net sparked some thinking.

Man as an organism is to the world outside like a whirlpool is to a river: man and world are a single natural process, but we are behaving as if we were invaders and plunderers in foreign territory. For when the individual is defined and felt as the separate personality or ego, he remains unaware that his actual body is a dancing pattern of energy that simply does not happen by itself. It happens only in concert with myriads of other patterns---called animals, plants, insects, bacteria, minerals, liquids, and gases. The definition of a person and the normal feeling of "I" do not effectively include these relationships. You say, "I came into this world." You didn't; you came out of it, as a branch from a tree."---Alan Watts,Does It Matter © 1968, 1969, 1970, p.23

The more I looked into themes, keywords and elements from that quote, the more inspired and overloaded with information I became. And the more I realized how many things linked to each other. My favorite find is the theme of mankind being the link/tree/bridge between Heaven and Earth and how, as "trees" we are simultaneously linked in community with one another.


This is reflected and represented in the Norse rune "Mannaz". It is the rune of humanity and speaks to our human experience. The energy of this rune screams of the significance humanity as part of a network found in this universe. All things in some form run into and out of this humanity and are either transformed or do the transforming, based on our individual and collective will. So much power, such a little vessel. 


On this day, the sun is at its peak in the northern hemisphere, and, for a moment, seems to stand still. At this point, the ancient Celts believed that a great marriage took place in that split second between the sun and his consort, the moon. They saw a great dance reach its climax point- the sun exerted all his glory and power at its height and then moved to let his lady begin to build up to her great moment, the winter solstice and Yule, six months (roughly) later. At this point, it would seem that we, humans, stand as the link between the sun, the earth and the moon, witnessing the dance, the marriage, the shift. One could even drop into a reality where we enable, create, allow this event to happen. Our ancestors thought so. 

Solstice activites were all centered around enhancing the power of the sun through bonfires, dancing, bright colors, joyous festivities and laughter. The belief was that the seasons would not change if we did not help them along. Maybe that is more accurate than popular thought today would have us believe. If in fact we do create our reality, then it is within our best interest to continue the wheel of the year. Perhaps this is so automatic for us now we are not even conscious of it working deep inside our collective mind, manifesting this constantly changing world around us. Cool to think about. 

My thoughts today are going to orbit this idea and its connection with the rune Mannaz and how my part of this tree, or my own tree within this network/forest, can engage and participate in this astrological event. Who knows, magick done in that "between time" might have a little more kick to it with this knowledge as power behind it. 

Cool Links
Checkout this page at Confessions of a Pagan Soccer Mom. She has some cool correspondences for Litha/Summer Solstice energies if you need some ideas for marking this occasion. 

Something's Gotta Stop the Flow

Jacob: You know the downward spiral is essentially a chain reaction.

Allel: And nothing that comes out of your mouth makes any sense.
Jacob: They're all reactions! One thing begets the next. A man has a weakness, he's flawed. That flaw leads him to guilt. The guilt leads him to shame. The shame he compensates with pride and vanity. And when pride fails, despair takes over and they all lead to his destruction. It will become his fate... Something's gotta stop the flow.

That dialog is from the movie "Ink", a story about a lost soul who tries to enter the ranks of the succubi by sacrificing the soul of a little girl, dodging her guardians, the Storytellers, and their Pathfinder, Jacob. A friend mentioned how incredibly cool the part of the movie where Jacob taps into the rhythm of the world around him (and then alters it by throwing off the rhythm) was and it's had me thinking ever since.

My favorite theory on the 2012 frenzy is that as the stars, sun, earth and then our cells all adjust to mirror the rythm set in motion by the stars, first, and then followed by the rest of this reality as we know it until these vibrations eventually adjust our thinking, evolution and outlook on the world. I think when 2012 hits we will barely notice it unless we are aware and watching for the shift in rhythm. When that happens, and it is a gradual thing really, I think the results will be amazing. The last few times this rhythm has hit a major number in the Fibonacci series, we've had a worldwide renaissance. What will this next renaissance entail? I have a lot of ideas, now I'm just going to have to wait and see.

Can we change what happens? If we do something now to "stop the flow" can we cause a massive shift to occur in alignment with what we will to happen? Things are fucked up right now, but the wheel always keeps on turning. Maybe our focus needs to be on tapping this rhythm so we can change the flow. My friend is already thinking this way and now has me obsessed with the idea. This needs more pondering and plotting.

Smartphone and Swype

I am up late tonight, not an unusual thing for me, and tinkering around with various things. Posted to facebook, took a couple random photos, downed more coffee than is good for me, sex IMed a friend's stalker for a half hour, and did some general worrying about the job market and my need of a second job and a new place to live with cheaper rent. Busy night. But on a jaunt to the restroom I thought how cool it would be to update my blog from the bathroom using my htc Evo. Lol So I am. And Swype makes it so fast.

Waiting Tables

Serving, the job description, has it's own culture. Wow! I guess I always naively thought that movies like "Waiting" (2005) were totally made up and for comedic value only. Turns out I was terribly wrong. And I've only just brushed the stainless steel surface of the industry in the last two weeks.

People have a different attitude. In many ways they either polarize on the side of crazy unnecessary drama or they're amazingly laid back. They come in all shapes and sizes. There are the crazy gossip chains, the rumors, people sleeping around with other co-workers, death threats (joking only... well, sometimes) muttered under the breath over the table of demanding "guests", people having a mental meltdown (ha ha, that was me), and a plethora of inside jokes. It's amazing. More so than any other job I've had, this new one takes the cake for it's crazy little secrets and quirks. The closest I've ever come to it is the coffee culture that comes with being a barista at any number of different coffee shops out there. Another world altogether, but one that's much easier to access if you're a regular.

When it comes to the restaurant business there really are two sides. The customer on one, the staff on the other. What a customer sees is usually nothing close to what's actually happening. And what a server sees is totally different. It's like a massive collision of two different perspectives in an age-old setting. And it works! For example, when you're the customer, you see the hospitality side of things, the good front, the cheery face, the mom/highschool student/college kid/two-job worker who's there to make sure that you get to eat and eat well and in a timely manner. Your whole experience is what you're getting out of it and how many stars to give it. On the flip side, as a server, you have a different outlook. You're the totally normal (or hey, maybe you are the odd child and you know it) yet totally unique and individual team member who's working to make sure you get as much out of the table as you can. Those tips are vital, a good review, key. You're also completely in it for what you can get out of it, but for different reasons. You're far from the model employee with the generic smile and scripted presentation. You're fiesty, chill, angry, stressed, overjoyed, hyper and any other crazy emotion out there. You have your bitch session around the corner, catch up on your co-worker's life, grab a quick smoke between tables. It's far more involved than I realized. It's fast paced (most of the time) and totally kicks your ass.

Now I know that every job has it's own "thing", but serving is a much different world in it's layout and presentation than I gave it credit for. Movies like "Waiting" now make a lot more sense.

And that's all I have to say for now. Lol

A Question About Subculture

Or at least that's the title I could settle on for this post.

The last couple days I've been listening to George Michael. I don't know what it is about his music but it always takes me back to nights at JR's, the local gay bar hotspot (one of them), and all the fun I have when I'm there. The atmosphere is friendly, the drinks are good and always heavy if you treat your bartenders right and show face on a regular basis, and the music is a constant blend of anything modern back to the 80's.

JR's was the first "gay" place I was taken to by a buddy of mine. I'd only been out of the closet for around 5-6 months and he was determined to get me indoctrinated and laid. Thank goodness. My first reaction to the hopping little joint was awe. I'd been in bars off and on since turning 21 a few months prior, but they were mostly cowboy bars and those places definitely had a different feel to them back then. This place was friendly, lively, filled with guys kissing guys, girls holding girl's hands, all the music that threatened to ignite a holy gay fire in your heart, and shirtless bartenders. Paradise is a gross understatement. But what really got me was the realization that I could be every ounce the gay man that I was and I would get nothing but cheers and encouragement from the people around me. I don't know that anything like that really exists for my friends who are straight. Maybe.

This brought up a question in my mind. Are we as human beings driven to find our own kind in the different "subcultures" that exist under and outside of the over-culture that runs the world today? Is this how we find our diversity and yet maintain a security found in people who are "just like us"?

While many people strive to be "normal" no-one that I know of would really want to truly be normal. To be so would be to cease striving against the norm and would result in a total lack of life or drive. Essentially, life would stop and whether the physical body followed suit or not that person would die inside. Some people achieve some level of this, but most of them eventually snap out of it again. The human doesn't want to die.

My post tonight is short, but hopefully thought-provoking.

Winter and Wonderland

I love this weather we're getting right now across the US. Here in Colorado it's coming down in a fine mist. Muthafuckin' Christmas snow in February. I will never understand why we're always two months behind with the weather. Whatever, I'll enjoy it while I can. Don't get me wrong, I am a little tired of winter, but nights like this spark the imagination. It apparently also sparks a sex drive and self-analyzing thought processes.

It may just be that it's Saturday and everyone wants to be out clubbing and socializing (or at least they do in my world), but I seem to have this unquenchable desire to listen to beat-heavy, hip-twisting music of the raunchy sort. I blame this on Rihanna's new song "S&M" (see below) and on a need to get the shag on with anyone of the male gender. This led to a whole parade on Facebook of some of my favorites. Definitely all songs I'd love to do the deed to. Does the song "Porn Star Dancing" properly communicate exactly where I'm at right now?

This is where the "Wonderland" comes into it. Anytime I start self-analyzing it turns into some weird, tripped out adventure into oblivion, much like Lewis Carroll's world. With all this sex on the brain it would appear that I was a perfectly normal gay man in his mid-20's.... holy shit, I'm 25... But where it gets weird is where you consider that I have next to no desire to go out and pursue guys. At least not right now. So my brain is telling me that "yes, Strange, you should go get hot and nasty with the brownchikinbrowncow" but my body is actually telling me "eh, dude, we are so not behind that sentiment." While I have no desire to fully expand on my thought process in a blog on the internet at this exact point in time, I have to wonder if there's a wall between my body and my brain. Are they two separate entities battling for control? Am I really two people with different agendas? Am I an alien? What exactly consists of war between entity pieces? Am I over thinking this? Oh yes.

Enjoy a bit of sexy.

The Wheel

"I am the axel on which the wheel turns."

This was my thought tonight as I drove home from my coffee haunt. Not one that is new for me. I've created a meditation in the past to monitor my position on the "Wheel of Fortune" and without careful attention to it, shit inevitably gets all over the fan blades. So I return to a practice and rite that has given me success in the past. My only question now is what the cost will be to spin the wheel back to fortune and prosperity. We'll see.

Craving Candy... and a Job

I'm up at an ungodly hour and the urge to blog is on me again. Some day I'll figure it out. I think it may be the mix of the high school playlist on Pandora and way too much time to think. The highlights of the last half hour have been the Verve and good ol' Nick Lachey. Youtube and Vevo are stupid and won't allow an embed of the Verve's video, but Nick's was available so check out the link above and the video below to get an idea of my listening experience.

While you're enjoying the audio hotness of said artists, keep reading.

Since my last legitimate post in September (2010) was in no way an update of any kind, I feel a bit behind. Why, you ask? Because the completionist (thank you Tal for that terminology) in me likes to update and catalog everything it can. Tonight, though, I think I'll try a different approach and not bore you, my invisible and unstimulated readers, into tears with things you most likely already know from my facebook updates and twitter ramblings (all 140 character's worth). So on to the important stuff.

I am plagued, or blessed, with unemployment as of two weeks ago, roughly. I give two possibilities because they are both very possible, to one degree or another... or altogether equally the same... or wholly 100% definite.... play with that paradox 'til your little hooman brain squeals... Despite where my subconscious-led perception takes me, I am adopting a positive approach in a rebellious act of middle-finger defiance to the chaotic outer dark entities who threw the dice on this job situation in the first place. I'm sure they enjoy it as much as I do. We've got a very special relationship going. I've taken on the view that the best direction for me is a mostly new one, fresh with undiscovered, ripened possibilities. The fact that I have absolutely no clue what I'm doing or where this is going is quite unimportant really. Who cares? The blessing is found in the reinvention of myself and the life I encapsulate "myself" in allowing new things in and old, unused things a way out the back door. The plague side of it is mostly a reaction to being in the "unemployment" situation again. I've been there, done that so many times, but each time I've done the same old thing with the same eventual result. Quote me the definition of insanity and I just might feast on your eyeballs. My solution- avoid the plague.

My thought process has been as follows- depression, fuck depression I'll win the lotto, I wonder if I can get a job as an escort, I wonder who's hiring within a five minute drive from my home, depression (again), I should call someone, maybe I'll sell my art, fuck I don't have a decent portfolio going right now, remember to work on portfolio later, check facebook, check online job listings, google top ten jobs to work from home, depression (yet again), damn I've got a lot of bills, those damn dead people don't have to deal with this shit, maybe I'll watch a scary movie, yeah I'll play the lotto, this damn economy better shape up soon, I need food.

Astute readers will notice that sex doesn't enter in there at all. That's right, I've literally not been thinking about sex at the usual frequency. And now back to what we all really want to read about.

I've found that with my options really open at the moment the one thing different this time from previous unemployment dilemmas is the fact that I don't want to pick up and move to a new location. I like where I'm at and want to find a way to stick it out in my current home. I'm also very much in the mood to win the lotto. The Colorado lottery is currently at 20 million and I'd be very happy to take home a 1 million dollar slice of that. In fact, I'm going to keep playing until I snag that prize. I know, all the odds fall against me, but hey, someone's gotta win so why not me? Thank you, Universe, in advance for your help with that. My other options are still wide open and will come into effect in short order. In the meantime I'm going to probably have to get any job available to pay the bills, but with all the good things on the horizon (yes, they're there, goddamn it) I don't anticipate needing it for very long.

I love talking about all of this so much I don't want to stop blogging, but a lengthy blog post the readers will not appreciate, so it must come to an end. On a positive note, things will get better even if they have to get worse for a bit to emphasize the good stuff when it rolls in. If you're in the same spot I am right now, hang tight.

Humanity- It's what's for dinner

Banned Zen Sayings

Found this tonight in an old box of tarot cards. These were bits of wisdom I found and held onto when I moved here to CO. They were promptly pulled from where I displayed them in my room while living with my grandparents and tossed into a trash bin. The paper still has the stains on it. Hanging onto this piece of paper has only refreshed old anger, so I'm burning it. However, the sayings on it are valuable to me and I think should be preserved.

- No matter what people say about you, know who you are. Their blame can't injure you, nor can their praise elevate you. You are what you are; nothing anyone can say can change that.

-Perfection isn't found in everything going right, but rather in accepting the beauty of what's happening moment to moment.

- The river flows, the mountain remains motionless. The river can't remain still, nor can the mountain flow. Is one right or wrong? Our dharma (duty) is to do what's ours to do, not to be like others.

- Become aware. It's a good practice to watch life as you would a movie. Be completely involved with it while it's happening, and then leave it behind when it's done. This is the way of detachment.

In Honour of the Male

I went to the woods to find my beloved,
My hair unbound,unbound my very being if not in love for him.
I went to the woods to find my beloved,
But my beloved was not there.
I called in the valley, but he did not answer,
I cried in our grove, but he did not come.
The mountain wolves found me, they hunted me for their prey.
The wolves chased me back to my home.

I charge you, oh brothers and sisters of my tribe,
If you find my beloved, tell him that I am heartsick and beaten.
What is thy beloved more than another beloved?
What is thy beloved more than another beloved that thou doest charge us?

Oh, my beloved is beautiful!
The raging stormy sea for his eyes,
Swimming with green Mother of Pearl,
Framed with thundercloud lashes,
Carrying in aside the threat of Winter's devastation the promise of Summer.
Dark chestnut bark for his hair,
Decked with crimson morning hue,
Bristled as the mighty boar's back,
Soft as the selkie's coat,
An Autumn forest in evening light,
The eclipsed moon rising.
His movement like the young stag,
Gliding and sliding through the forest,
Striding across the heath,
But gentle, oh so gentle, his touch,
Late summer's gossamer on my skin,
Holding fast as the roots of the might oak.
His presence a shining light,
The soft moon's glow on his skin.
Fragrant his embrace like Spring flowers.
His voice a calling bell resonating deep within me.
A seidh-spawn of an earthly norris,
Fairest among men.
This is my friend,
This is my beloved,
Oh brothers and sisters of my tribe.


- Daniel MacKenzie

To the best of my ability, I copied this from the Druidcast podcast to share in text form here. If you want to hear Daniel recite it, check out Episode 39 of the Druidcast podcast.

It's My Freaking Will To...

-See.

-Love.

-Grow.

-Laugh.

-Create.

-Be god.

-Be strong.

-Be inspired.

-Understand.

-Know myself.

-Institute order.

-Be prosperous.

-Post crazy blogs.

-Be unconcerned.

-Have abundant joy.

-Be deserving of lust.

-Be abundantly happy.

-Be deserving of respect.

-Know uncommon things.

-Be surrounded by friends.

-Have more money than I need.

-Have the balls to say "Fuck you."

-Inspire others to empower themselves.

-Be unconcerned with the opinions of everyone else.

-Smile at things that nobody would smile at.

-Be deserving of great knowledge.

-Dance at the edge of all that is.

-Make shit up and laugh at it.

-Reinforce my own worth.

-Connect with the world.

-Keep my own counsel.

-Be deserving of love.

-Be mentally sound.

-Be wholly myself.

-Live in freedom.

-Speak honestly.

-Rule my world.

-Communicate.

-Be powerful.

-Make chaos.

-Be fearless.

-Destroy.

-Inspire.

-Desire.

-Teach.

-Make all this and more happen through practice, discipline and clear thinking.

And thus ends my brain spillage for the evening.

Pens and Paper and Stories

There's a book where your story was written and and read, where your name was woven in with others and loved, where simple embelishment was commonplace. But on a morning wind, cold and angry, the fate that was written was shattered by your hand and the love that wove itself in and around your name recoiled at the action. It was after that you saw that it was not freely given and a fight against a destiny meant a rewrite of the script. Now your name is no longer written, and the ties that were are discarded in haste. As time moves forward, the hand moves backwards and your name becomes an ink spot or coffee stain. From time to time, other pens touch the page with your name but it never goes further than a sentence or two. Lost in jumble of a history of a different course, your only option is to open another book, white pages pure and untouched, and begin to carefully give the name a new home. Only after starting a line or two do you realize that there are smudges on your page. And as you look at the ink, dark and different, swirling in the patterns of your own handprint, you feel a bittersweet comfort knowing that a bit of the book that spawned your name has found its way into a new history. Maybe in time the stains on your hand will fade and each day will start truly fresh and free.

Stairs in Winter

Wishing, It's What's for Dinner

Okay, maybe it has nothing to do with dinner. But it's good, no denying that. In a weird headspace, totally over caffeinated, and after having just talked to a friend about their money troubles I found myself in an emotional spot. I felt love and wanted to share it. The first thing that came to mind was that I wished I had the money and financial stability to be able to help out my friends in tough financial situations right now. To be able to give without expecting anything in return, to be able to invest in the security and happiness of the people I love or care for.

Now as wonderful as this sounds I also understand that my desire to do this is not completely unselfish. Yes, it would make me feel good. I would feel good about myself and, if allowed to run unchecked, could drive my ego to a very bad place. But I've never (I think) had trouble with ego-invested giving. I've always just given without a second thought. This has gotten me into trouble, true, but it is one of the ways I show love and I've never regretted having given and loved in that way. I'd like to continue to do that minus the financial trouble.

So, in true Disney fashion it would seem, I wished on a star. Now this is not the shallow "starlight, star bright" crap from Pinochio, though there are bigger meanings to all of that story if you go deeper. I took it to a more magickal level.

Today being Friday means that it is Freya's day, the day of Love, Venus' day. It also happens to be a day drenched in the power of a partial lunar eclipse. Mercury just left retrograde. And this bad witch doesn't have a clue what the moon's doing, but I believe she's gone dark, good for beginnings, birthing new ideas, creation. So my petition/wish to the beautiful Morning Star, Lady of Love, was one of assistance in realizing my wish. To channel love and alchemically transform it into prosperity to then give back to those who've shown me love. Freya is pretty good with such things, and partnered with the great Jupiter and his amazing expansive power right now has put some amazing currents out there.

So I've wished upon a star. And it was good. And now the caffeine has other plans.

Spinning

I'm now a yarn spinning crazy person! I got this drop spindle from my friend Slithershimmy and am utterly hooked. The roving she gave me is a really cool hunter green and spins nicely. Had to let all my blog peeps know, well, 'cus most of you are yarn whores.

Future and Career

In the last couple days I have talked about a positive outlook on the coming year. It seems to come up in a lot of conversations, notably one today. I ask the question- Are careers inconsequential in our current situation?

I suck at politics and money and probably have no good background for bringing this up, but hey, it's my blog and I can at least voice my very likely uneducated opinions.

From discussions with friends with better financial and professional backgrounds I've heard over and over that our views of a person's work history have changed dramatically over the last ten years, even longer. Maybe the last forty. Staying with one job at the same company for 20+ years is a thing of the past. Employers like the renaissance type- someone who has had a multitude of experience over several jobs whether within one field or in many. This changes the modern professional's approach to their work and steps toward a career. Is a career outside of their reach or is it within their grasp? It's all in their hands. Based on the type of job they want to land and the kind of money they want to make they have many options open to them. They could stay with one company and try to climb their way to the top. They could jump opportunistically from job to job until they reach the point they are shooting for and the salary they wish to make. Risky but exciting. Or they could strike out on their own as an entrepreneur and create their own path to wealth and prosperity. These are three common roads.

For myself, I like and strive to one day create my own career with myself as my boss. But this is not doable right at this moment. I've never found the static first choice to be very useful to me because I tend to quickly lose interest. So I work within the second model.

Having never finished college and not currently planning to return I find myself constantly viewing options and jumping at new avenues as they come up. This works for me. Keeps me engaged. Until the crash of the economy I had progressively moved up in pay with each new job I took on over a course of six years. Granted, it was never a huge leap, but I always went up. With the current and much needed job I have taken quite a pay cut. And this has made me think about the future. What can I start doing right now to begin a process that will yield results I am looking for a.k.a a career of my choosing with all the elements I consider to be essential to a great line of work and an enjoyable job experience? And I've begun to seriously evaluate where I want to go.

I've not yet decided what exactly it is I'm shooting for, but a have a hazy collage of mismatched ideas and dreams that given the right glue will all fall together at some point. For now I'm supremely happy that I understand I have options and that whether we call it a career or a job, it will be a great adventure when the time comes.

Do I need a degree? I doubt it. Should I stay with every job as long as I can and focus on working my way up? Maybe, but never to the extreme that I lose focus of the end goal. Do I think I'll figure this out in '10? Probably not, but I intend to make some headway. Life is moving on every minute and it's time I started finding ways to enjoy living it the way I dream I do.

And that's my thoughts tonight. Scrambled, but mine.

The Gods- Musings and Ramblings

K, so this is gonna be one of those deep thinking posts. But hey, with as much as I am not-committing-in-order-to-trick-myself-into-keeping-this-up-and-in-reality-committing to posting every day, there will be some shallow posts from time to time so it never gets too deep.

It's been on my mind quite a bit and sparked a great convo with my roommate on the nature of these things/beings/ideas that we call gods. There are many names for them and even more perspectives on what they are. A friend recently asked me how I see the divinity as a witch, whether it was as one divine source of all things, a dual aspect idea of male/female and light/dark, as many separate beings each with their own reality, or something else, to which I replied (in a nutshell) "yes". I see it as all of those.

Every religion with it's own link to the divine has boxed in how the god/dess/s can manifest in their reality. Sometimes they even go so far as to not box it in which usually results in a bigger box. Categorization. We need it to comprehend. We also sometimes try to move beyond boxed thinking and it can be tricky. Really hard to put to words. But we will always manage to wrap some sort of form around it in order to allow it the place in our lives that need it.

My own thinking trends towards models that I have built from my own experience of God. I choose to cling very loosely to belief and go with what I know. I know that I have experienced connection to a source concept of God. My whole being is one with that source. Quantum theory supports this. Everything is matter and energy, and matter is just energy condensed in a way. The logic follows that everything is energy and we are all a part of each other. We come from God and God comes from us. Inseparable. I also have experienced light and dark, good and bad, yin and yang, and know that these are just dual faces of God and yet separate entities at the same time. Dual and unified. Very recently I have worked specifically with gods of form and function. Pan, Hades, and Cerridwen. Aspects and archetypes of human experience and a few of the facets of divinity. Yet they are each other and all the same thing. And finally, I have experienced my own god soul. It's that part of me that is divine, closely connected with divinity and divinity in me. A bright flame of godhood that burns in the vessel of my body. Without it I am incomplete. To unite fully with it is to be whole, fully self possessed.

These are my gods. They manifest in many ways and not always in ways I expect. They are allies, friends, teachers and extensions. With them I am co-creating the world I exist in. With their requested assistance I make powerful magick. From them I gain knowledge and understanding. They are essential for my experience of other realms of existence and I am essential to their experience of this physical reality.

Yesterday I talked about falling in love with the world. In many creation myths and particularly the Feri version the goddess creates the world out of an act of love. If then I truly fall in love with the world, what amazing things will we create together?

I am going to find out.

Fall in Love with the World

It's been a while since my last post. Today I read many of the new postings on my Adopted Mom's blog, My Little Room, and really felt very happy that an element that used to be such a fun and personally important part of my weekly routine of blog reading had returned. I hadn't realized how far gone i'd been from the blogger's sphere. 

So now I sit here in my cozy room in my cozy house listening to music from my early years (lol, post-highschool and "early adult" years) and fully enveloped in good feelings and a happy, whole, contented settling in my other part/vibrational otherself/soul. 

I've been ridiculously optimistic about life lately and it's been a great change. I don't know exactly what to credit for that as a great many things just seem to be good, even in spite of everyday concerns over typical, mundane things. The stars have literally aligned for me along with those floaty bits we call planets. Big things are up and coming with the coven and my ongoing magickal edumacation and every day seems to bring new magick and mystery where before things were just too muggle. My job with the spice shop is good, far from perfect, but really good and I have a lot to be thankful for with having a job. Money is just as tight as it always has been, but somehow it doesn't weigh on me like it has in the past. I'm creating a home and loving every minute of it. I have been really aware of how many amazing people are friends of mine and how many of them are so very unique and amazing. The frackin' holidays have really brought in some great memories alongside the usual frustrations that always rear their ugly heads. I've rediscovered some old artsy loves and started enjoying them. The sky really does seem to be the limit. 

This crazy optimism has been really helpful for me in my interactions with so many friends who seem to be having a rough time of it right now. It's allowed me to be able to really listen and hopefully offer help that is beneficial in some way. I like beaing able to be there for friends. I haven't always been emotionally and physically able to be that person, but lately its been easy and I'm happy to be able to help my friends out in that way. 

The muggle new year 2010 holds a lot of promise. I look forward to discovering new adventures, making new memories, seeing old friends, starting new and healthier pursuits and hobbies and even getting more involved in environmental activism and the gay and pagan communities. The possibilities abound for co-creating amazing change in the world this year. We are ready for it as a global community. actively involving oneself in such an amazing venture is the stuff of dreams. I feel compelled to weave the positive energy i am drenched in right now into the information network out there in the hopes that new and bigger things can happen. 

I want to fall in love with the World this year. And as cheesy and New Agey as all of this sounds right now, its heartfelt and kind of intoxicating. Find your connection to the people in your life and get drunk on happiness.